Precision Data
Real-time, reliable meteorological tracking. The weather is terrible. The data isn't.
Accurate forecasts for catastrophic days
Weather forecasts as miserable as your Mondays.
Hyper-local Open-Meteo data, delivered with unflinching British dry humour. Real numbers, honest verdicts, and absolutely no fake sunshine.
Why we exist
Every other app is a motivational poster with a thermometer. Here's the difference, side by side.
Traditional weather apps
Under the Weather
“0% chance of rain”
It rains anyway. You are soaked.
“It's going to rain. Cancel your plans and stay inside.”
“Sunny, 24°C — enjoy!”
Says nothing about the humidity.
“Blistering heat. You will sweat through that shirt.”
“Partly cloudy”
Meaninglessly optimistic.
“Bland, grey broth. Outdoor plans are decorative.”
“Light breeze”
Your umbrella disagrees.
“15 km/h of wind. Your hair is a lost cause.”
Everything you need to expect the worst
Serious meteorology. Unserious delivery. Both entirely on purpose.
Cynical Condition Ratings
Custom alerts that tell you plainly when outside has become genuinely unbearable.
No Toxic Positivity
No cheerful sun icons at 3°C. If it's grim, the app says grim.
Daily Dose of Realism
Notifications calibrated precisely to your already low expectations.
A closer look at the gloom
Dashboard, hourly disappointment, the seven-day sentence and cynical settings. Real screens, real data, real attitude.
Dashboard
Current conditions, atmospheric summary and daily dress code protocol.
Hourly & Weekly
Chronological reality check and the week-long disappointment.
Cynical Settings
Customize glass transparency, colour palette and unit preferences.
Powered by open, high-accuracy meteorological databases (Open-Meteo integration). The jokes are ours. The numbers are science.
No tracking
Your location stays on your device.
Minute-fresh
Continuous model updates.
Model blending
Multiple sources, one grim answer.
Expect the worst.
At least you'll be right.
Download Under the Weather and finally get a forecast that matches your mood.
